Caddies share their biggest on-course pet peeves

By T.J. Auclair · December 16, 2019

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It was an innocent question we tossed out to our Twitter followers a couple of weeks back: what are your biggest on-course pet peeves?

And, boy, did it hit a nerve! OK… maybe the question wasn’t “that innocent.” We were hoping for a response and we got it.

It was almost like on Seinfeld when it was Frank Costanza’s turn to air his grievances on Festivus:

Without further adieu, here are our favorite responses from our followers…

“Iron covers. No better indication of poor play and lousy tip.” — @vedderkj

PGA Tour caddie Joe Etter was a fan of the iron cover mention and added this: “100%. Pair those with plastic tubes and you might as well just go home.”

RELATED: The definitive guide to tipping a caddie | 23 hilarious caddie one-liners

“Range finder battery dying on 2 tee.” — @johnlewman1yah1

“Hitting a 12 footer 12 feet by the hole and telling you it didn’t break.” — @Lashstronaut

“Players who repeatedly hand me their trash to throw away.” — @trestice_hs

“Leaving the club resting on the bag. Put that shit back in.” — @Sjstaley1174

“Every time I hear ‘really?’ I want to say ‘no, actually I am giving you bad information in hopes of making less money today.'” — @k_kcgonzo25

“Amateur golfers who use tour bags that have rain gear (on a sunny day), enough balls to fill a range bucket, and head covers on all their clubs.” — @Aytesball

“Being second-guessed by a guest late in a round after giving great reads and excellent yardage, slow players and cheap players.” — @derbycaddy

“Caddies wearing golf shoes.” — @HerbieChamplin1

“A 25 handicap with 3W out of rough.” — @GolfTilDeath

“Giving the correct read and the player making a bad stroke and blaming it on the read.” — @Ryanman777

“1. Cheapskates. Most places you play that require caddies cost good money. So tip properly; 2. Iron covers; 3. The guy in the group who wants to play the back tees and thinks the other 3 guys who can’t play as well as him should accommodate him; 4. Staff bags with 6 dozen balls; 5. People who hold their hand out 2 seconds after they tossed you their golf ball to clean.” — @Kygolfnews

“Players pretending to be hurt cause they’re playing bad.” — @HerbieChamplin1

“Players who walk into the bunker one way and then exit thru the opposite side or end they entered.” — @GottaAskKay

“People hitting at the same time and expecting to know where both balls went.” — @TheJoeyMcCusker

“People using a putter to get the ball out of the hole.” — @rya526

“Guys that are worth millions yet want to look 5 minutes for their ball 8 clicks up a mountain.” — @7outshooter

“On pro-am day I’ll give the number and the amateur players get the laser and shoot the pin saying, ‘Oh no… It’s less or more on my range finder.'” — @jorgeo23

“Blaming the caddie for poor shot execution.” — @green_hitter

“Taking 5 minutes to read an 80-foot putt. Literally read it from every angle.” — @BIsaac17

“Men jingling change in their pocket while my player is over the ball.” — @onceacaddy

“Always loved the guy who hit his driver consistently 180 all day and he’d play a par 4 that’s 420, ‘What do I have in?’ ‘240.’ ‘That to the pin?'” — @eghsbrock

READ: How I became a PGA Tour caddie | Unwritten rules to caddying

“… and don’t forget that at 240 back, you must wait for the green to clear before hitting your 50-yard worm burner.” — @Indlake

“Loading me up with your beers… Bro, I’m not your bartender.” — @LooperNation

“Players that are so cheap they don’t take caddies, but ask the caddie every question under the sun then run away after the round.” — @MJ_Doran

“Players who dig feet in and don’t smooth out footprints.” — @lippardtom

“Was slow play! Also, a complete lack of any shelter during delays!” — @danegolf1960

“The new pin rule and players who can’t decide whether they want it in or out and then change their minds throughout the round.” — @NateT215

“Don’t tell me you’re a 4 handicap when you’re clearly a 24.” — @tsrfarr

“Golfers not pulling a club after approach shot misses the green when they know damn well which wedge they are going to use to chip on.” — @SmirKkDiggler

“Player pulling the flagstick and tossing it on the green.” — @JoshRawn

“Holding the umbrella. No other correct answer.” — @weisstho1800

“Player: ‘You sure??’ Me in my head: ‘No, I make my living lying.’; Player from 250+ in the rough: Pulls 3W Me: ‘Rough is thick. Probably want to hit this into the fairway and restart the process. (Handing him the grip side of a SW).’ Player: ‘No, I’ll stick with the 3W.'” — @TheeGreenMoose

“Fellow player hits it in shit. We start to look. ‘What ball ya playin’?’ ‘I don’t know. It’s either a Titleist 2 or 3, or an old Callaway. But maybe not.'” — @GolfTilDeath

“‘It didn’t break.’ Well, sir, you hit it 15 feet by the hole so…” — @RyanAHammond

“The other caddie in the group being drunk or lazy.” — @oc_erit

“Members trying to rake their own bunkers and doing an awful job.” — @lanceaaffl

“When bags become storage facilities and not golf bags.” — @TC4Ireland

“Slow play by amateurs who act like every putt is to win the Masters.” — @oconnor_dick

“Singles on Saturdays who expect to play through the pack. Get some golf friends, buddy.” — @N0RMANCH0MSKY

“My biggest peeves: cherry flavor smelling cigars and the old standoff — ‘come find me the clubhouse’; or, ‘I’ll met up with you in the pro shop’ and then ditch! Albeit that was some years ago.” — @Nightrain_layne

“When a player doesn’t grab a club for his/her next shot… And I’m not a mindreader. If you want me to show you a line on the green, ask.” — @SamediBenjamin

“Rain gear. In the desert.” — @SkateLaceBite

“Player rummaging through their bag when another player is preparing to hit a shot.” — @realBuckyGator

“Worst golfer in the group being the slowest golfer in the group.” — @ToddMcKee11

“When the player blows it by 20 feet and says with a straight face, ‘that ball didn’t move.’ GTFOH.” — @305_steve

“Rushed rake jobs and no divot replacement.” — @ALanoII

“Time people take on greens or just taking too much time! #paceofplay: — @dbz99

“Putting two rakes next to each other when leaving a bunker.” — @Caddiedawg

“Me making mistakes.” — @SkipperOfTheWay

“Guys giving me their club, not looking as they walk away and their arms drop, making it even more out of reach.” — @SkipperOfTheWay

“Hacks who think they are gonna score on courses that have held multiple majors.” — @derek4real29

“When a guest comes and plays and has to make every single putt even from one inch. Then when 8 in the fairway. Take break this hole.” — @laphillyfan